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What Is A "High Value Man"​? And Why Do Some Women Want Him?

Updated: Mar 20

The "high value man" has been all the buzz lately. The men want to be a high value man and the women want to be with a high value man.

So what is a high value man exactly? And why do women want him?

First, lets break down the 3 words and provide a dictionary definition. The following definitions are according to Merriam-Webster Dictionary:

High-advanced in complexity, development, or elaboration

Value- relative worth, utility, or importance

Man- an individual human. especially : an adult male human

So according to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, a high value man is an adult male human who is of relative worth, utility or importance and is advanced in complexity, development, or elaboration.

In modern, everyday terms, what that means is, he's educated, well-respected and is a high earner.

BONUS: As an added bonus, I'm going to speak on the man who is a few tax brackets ABOVE the high value man, and that is the ELITE man. This is the man models are after.

Now that we know what a high value man is, lets discuss why a woman would want a high value man in the first place. To a woman, a high value man represents power, authority and security. All of which contribute to making a woman feel safe, secure, protected and provided for. And there's nothing wrong with a woman having a strong desire to be with a man who offers these things. But my question to all the single ladies around the world is... are you targeting the right men to get the high value FROM?

There are some men who just aren't cut out for the role of husband and father; they evidence this through their consistent actions throughout their entire lives. Yet, countless women willfully line up to try and convince men who have proven to the rest of the world that they are not family oriented and do not value marriage, all because of his social and economic status. In the woman's mind, she views him as a resource, and some women are able to get the resources their heart truly desires from high value and elite level men, but at what cost?

Unfortunately for a lot of women, they aren't looking at the big picture, of how chasing after Elite or high value men is going to affect her mental health in the long run. She's too high off the idea that she's potentially going to be provided for at no real cost to her. And this is the mistake so many women make; looking to make significant withdrawals from a man where there has been no significant deposits (and he can feel it). Pursing a man for his social/economic status is a survival tactic women have been forced to use to ensure their survival. Times have changed, and now women are able to work, go to school and create whatever life they want for themselves.

Before embarking on a dating or relationship journey, it's important to evaluate where you currently are in life (low value, average or high value) and determine what type of man you want to build a life with. Where you are in life will heavily influence the type of man you are qualified for, as well as the type of man you pursue... and why. And there's no shame in pursuing a man on your level. Just like there's no shame in a man who is average, accepting that he is in fact average. There can be no progress until there is an acknowledgment of where you currently are in life.

For example, if you're in the low class status, that's totally fine (for now), just as long as you have plans to move forward and up in life (legitimately), but until you take those steps (for yourself), high value men will most likely not consider you or take you seriously. Which is why we see a lot of women getting their bodies surgically altered; they want to give off the impression of being of greater value, but what they're actually doing is showing men of all levels just how low value they truly are. This is evident because they are literally cheating the system by not doing the work, skipping steps and trying to get access to places they don't belong by way of superficial and artificial presence. #SurvivalMode

The danger for women who take this approach is that they will most definitely find their way into the rooms where high value men are, and they will continue to be invited into the social events, but only for entertainment purposes. High value men may even have children with them, but not to build a family legacy; often times it's by accident or from simply being irresponsible (which is common for high value men who are still single). The reason why high value men won't take them seriously is because they themselves don't take life seriously. They are single, enjoying life, making lots of money and enjoying the women who allow them to enjoy them for free.

If you are an average woman, your sweet spot is to go for the average guy. The average guy is age appropriate, shares the same values as you do and makes enough money to live an average life. Unfortunately for so many women, this is unappealing because they want the glitz and glamour lifestyle that they see on TV or hear about through their elite associates. They've convinced themselves that they deserve a high value man despite the fact that they themselves are average or they have not helped any man, let alone a high value man become high value.

My advice to the woman on all levels is to first be honest with where you are in life; doing so will help you clearly see what you are actually qualified for. Once you come to terms with this, you'll be able to appreciate all the average men you overlooked in high school, college, church, the gym, work, events, around the neighborhood, etc. In fact, average men are everywhere! But the average woman doesn't see just how valuable he is, because she's subconsciously pedestalizing the high value man, or wasting her time making herself feel better by saving low value men.

But here's the main thing you need to know about the average man. The average man will never be more than average if he doesn't have the right help. If you pay close attention to the vast majority of women who are now married to men who are high value, most will be able to confirm that their now "high value" husband was once very much average. She will also tell you that when she dated "high value" men in the past, they likely weren't faithful, weren't marriage minded and weren't in alignment with her long-term relationship goals. She merely liked the idea of being with a man who had high value status.

Here's a more detailed description of the different levels of single men that are on the single marketplace:

Level 1: Low Value man

Education Level- GED

Average Income- Less than $52,000

Mindset-Has BIG dreams, with no plan.

Life Goals-None

Level 2: Average Man

Education Level- High School/Bachelors

Income- $52,000-$156,000

Mindset- Maintain a steady job

Life Goals- Family oriented

Level 3: High Value Man

Education Level- Masters/PHD

Income- More than $156,000

Mindset- Leader

Life Goals- Family & Career

Level 4: Elite

Education Level- Varies

Income- $1M+

Mindset- Visionary, Innovator, Trendsetter, Leader

Life Goals- Build a lasting legacy

This figures were taken from a site called "Money USA New", which provides income by education level. Read more.

Now that we have a more clear definition and description of the terminology that has been used throughout the dating and relationship space, women have the power to make a more definite determination on which type of man she wants/needs in their life. Which will also impact their strategy for attracting the quality of man they actually qualify for. Not to mention, being the type of woman that this caliber of man would be attracted to in the first place.

We now understand that the term "high value" man isn't just some term men can use to make themselves feel better about themselves. Quite the contrary; they actually have to have the receipts to prove it. Which most high value men are happy to do. And it's not necessarily about him bragging or boasting in a cocky or arrogant way. No! It's more so a sense of pride when it comes to his accomplishments.

You won't have to ask if he's a high value man; when you go to his home or office for example, you'll just know he's a high value man by the evidence you see with your own eyes. Just to refresh your memory, a high value man in modern, everyday terms is a man who is educated, well-respected and is a high earner. So you will likely see plaques, degrees, awards, certificates, honors, pictures, medals and all types of representations of his stature.

When you Google his name or ask around about him, he will likely have raving reviews about his integrity, character and contribution to the world. You'll even find critics who are against his philosophies and practices; even more signs of his significance in the world. When you try to add him on social media, if you are a high value woman, you will find that you have quite a few professional contacts in common. Why? Because high value people associate with other high value people.

If for example, you see a high value man at an event, you might notice his shoes are always of high quality, his grooming is exceptional, his speech is impeccable and the quality of the events he attends is always where other high value men and women associate. For example: Grand openings, Fundraisers, Gala's, etc.

He's an investor in other people; is usually a mentor to the youth and can often be found volunteering, fundraising and giving back to the community. So to cross paths with this type of man, you can keep your ears to the streets on events centered around fundraising, ticketed events, etc. The best part is that wherever there's one high value men, there's usually many more. And each one has a network full of men who are single and high value. But the most important thing to understand about these types of men is if he has reached this level of success without a wife... he's probably already convinced himself that he doesn't need one.

Keep in mind that men like these types are usually highly sought after by women of all levels (if you can imagine). Especially with their being such a high percentage of men in the low-average value status. What that means is, he knows he is high value and will likely expect every person (man or woman) to treat him as such. Now sure, there are men who are in the high value status who eventually settle down, but do your due diligence and check his health status, debt status and criminal/warrant status. He may be settling down because he's in some kind of trouble.

High value men are not difficult to access. They. are simply difficult to convince to take life, family and marriage seriously. So what can single women do to combat this? The secret is to swim in the large pool of interested, available and accessible average men. Average men have a stronger desire to be husbands, fathers and friends. In fact, you may have a world of quality, single, eligible make friends sitting in your friend zone collecting dust.

If you view him as an average man, this is a great start. Imagine what he will become (with your help). Isn't that the primary purpose of being in a marriage in the first place? To be a help mate. This is your opportunity to show him just how valuable you are. He might be average while you are dating, but the more you poor into him (if you are pouring value into him), the closer he will get to becoming high value.

Now this is not to be confused with building a man. I'm not advising you to build a man. I'm advising you to consider the man who is average, and is already building himself. Take him and add to what he's already doing. Avoid men who are low value; it's not your job to fix him. That's Jesus' job. Life that man up in PRAYER!

No more exhausting yourself trying to convince men who have money and social status to take you seriously. Leave them to the young models who need money and status. You are woman of great value and your greatness is needed where the average men are lacking. Together, y'all will make a POWER HOUSE couple. And you soon will have your very own high value man.

Did you find this blog helpful? Comment below and let me know your thoughts.

In the next 14 Days, I want to show you how to attract your ideal mate. Click here to learn how.

With Love,

Cheyenne Bostock

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